A FIRESIDE CHAT WITH EAZY JESUS OF PIMPADELIC


Pimpadelic has the catchy moniker of being the worst band to come out of Texas. The Pimps know how to rock the boat, a cruise I might add that's been fucking boring. Limp Bizkit, the boy bands, the Christinas and Britneys, and Santana are swell, but have no panache. Pimpadelic may not have their notoriety, but give these white boys time and you can bank on the fact that you will be hearing of them one way or another. I must say the whole time I was talking to Eazy Jesus, the frontman, I kept thinking of the Jesus Twins from the Stern show. Pimpin' ain't easy. Eazy Jesus, folks, unedited and in his own words.


FRED JUNG: Let's start from the beginning.

EAZY JESUS: We played through different bands and shit. The five guys that we have together now, we've been together for the last four, five, or six years. This lineup has been together five or six years, since '95 or '96. So it's been just like people coming and going, but still trying to keep the dream alive.


FJ: Tough finding the right combo.

EAZY JESUS: Well, not really. We went through a few people, but it was no big deal. It just took longer than we thought it would. It is just a little sweeter now too. We put out three independent releases before we got picked up.


FJ: So how do you go from glam hair band to a gang of pimps?

EAZY JESUS: Oh, well, that was way before. That was when everybody was doing it, shit.


FJ: I can't imagine you looking like Poison.

EAZY JESUS: Oh, man, I got my tease on dog. I really did. Fuck, I still love some of that music. I might still tease my hair up every once and a while. I don't like the spandex though.


FJ: It's difficult to look hard clad in spandex.

EAZY JESUS: Oh, man, fuck it. But, no, that was just how we kind of evolved. That is by no means what we are, but that is just like pretty much what I did. You go through all kinds of music. You go through punk and heavy metal and then the glam thing happened and here we are.


FJ: Being from Fort Worth, Texas, is it all cowboys and tumbleweeds?

EAZY JESUS: I'm a cowboy. I'm a punk too. Just cause I don't have a mohawk doesn't mean I'm not a punk. Just because I don't wear Wranglers doesn't mean I am not a cowboy. We're putting everything together. We don't give a fuck. If we like it and we like the way it sounds and like the way it feels, I don't give it a shit if it is punk, funk, suck dick, whatever, as long as it sounds good and it feels right, let's go with it. I have so many influences.


FJ: Who were some of those influences?

EAZY JESUS: We all grew up with our parents listening to country and western, obviously. You get into your metal with Ozzy and all that shit, the Sex Pistols, Damned, Clash, the Cure. I've been through everything. My CD case tells it. I have got George Strait and the list goes on and then you get into all the rap stuff too.


FJ: Easy Jesus, nice name.

EAZY JESUS: That's the name they gave me. It just kind of stuck, drinking that E&J shit. I don't know. I kind of liked it and so I kind of kept the dream alive.


FJ: Are you guys the filthiest band around?

EAZY JESUS: By far.


FJ: How is Pimpadelic filthier than say, Insane Clown Posse?

EAZY JESUS: We just tell it like it is and try to have a good time with it. It's nothing serious. If you take it serious, you should turn it off or turn your head. It is basically all just a good time and kind of piss some people off.


FJ: You're doing a swell job so far.

EAZY JESUS: You're God damn right. I'm sure you will be hearing about it.


FJ: People love you or they hate you, how come you get such violent reactions?

EAZY JESUS: Hey, man, any publicity is good publicity. Love me or hate me, but you're going to know who the fuck I am.


FJ: How many tattoos do you have?

EAZY JESUS: I've got a few.


FJ: Tattoos are like M&Ms, can't just have one.

EAZY JESUS: Yeah, but I take my time. My DJ, he just goes off the fucking hook. You get a couple of beers in him and he will be like, "Fuck it. Let's go. I don't give a fuck. Give me something." I try to take a little bit more time thinking about mine. I only have probably five or six.


FJ: You have a favorite?

EAZY JESUS: I like "white trash" on my beer gut. That's a good one.


FJ: Are you guys a bunch of rappin' rednecks or are you trailer park white trash, or both?

EAZY JESUS: I think we're a little bit of both, a little bit of country and a little bit of rock and roll.


FJ: I'm curious as to what defines an "easy girl?"

EAZY JESUS: Easy girl? They're all easy. They're all easy. It just depends on your rap.


FJ: Do you have a good rap?

EAZY JESUS: Does Howdy Doody got wooden balls? And if your rap don't work, you just wrap them in the face. If they don't give it to you, you might as well take it. But do that now a days and the law is on your ass before you know it.


FJ: Well, your rap sure worked for the daughter of the guy that owned a storage space the band was using to practice. I read you were sleeping with her and so you didn't have to pay for rent.

EAZY JESUS: That's the truth. We were never with her. We just all fucked her. That was back in the day. But you have got to use your resources. I have been bangin' this whore. We will just have her go ahead and write down that we paid. But then she started holding that shit over our head and shit, so you have got to fuck her. It's a dirty job, but somebody's got to do it.


FJ: Do you Pimps have groupies?

EAZY JESUS: We have a few. I wouldn't call them groupies. I call them bitches.


FJ: So your pimp hand is strong?

EAZY JESUS: Shit, I guarantee you. My favorite thing to do at the house is just to beat dick. I would much rather jack off then fuck a bitch six days out of seven in the week. I swear to God. It's just too much drama these days.


FJ: (I caught Easy in the middle of a beer) So what are you drinking?

EAZY JESUS: Milwaukee's Best Light. Yeah, I'm drinking one right now. And when we're in places that are a little too good for that, I always like a Bud Light. But then again, when I am up on a line of coke or something, I will drink fuckin' anything.


FJ: So who hasn't been in a bar fight?

EAZY JESUS: I just got my earring ripped out about three weeks ago behind a titty bar out here in Fort Worth.


FJ: What brought this on?

EAZY JESUS: Oh, I was just mouthing and you get my drummer all jacked up and he's like the biggest dude in the band and you get him pissed off and then you can't hold him back and when your homeboys get into it, you know? Because we come in a gang. I'm the smallest dude in the band, but I got the biggest mouth, so I've got to carry people with me. I ain't going to lie to you. I ain't tough.


FJ: So what is on tap for you Pimps?

EAZY JESUS: The record comes out the fifteenth and we're filming a video Sunday with Matt Zane, the porno director and he's bringing down some porn stars and we're going to see what happens and we're going to make a clean edit for MTV and see if they can laugh at our face with it. We're jumping on the road. We've got our management and booking. We're ready to go.


FJ: Do you really think a Matt Zane directed Pimpadelic video will ever air on MTV?

EAZY JESUS: I don't know. Our management's pretty impressive. I don't know. I hope. We will one way or another. I'll put it to you like that.


Fred Jung is the Editor-In-Chief and along with Whitney Houston is telling all to Diane Sawyer. Comments? Email Him